A very real and funny article from a husband (not a sewist) to her wife (a sewist).
I tried to explain that this was a one time deal the first time I agreed to post on the blog. It didn’t help when you readers started leaving comments about how funny my post was and now here I am, roped into writing another post. I could just see the wheels turning in Melissa’s head – that this would be a recurring thing.
But I’m saying this right now: football season starts soon, so get your fill because I’m not writing any more posts.
The topic I was given this time was, “Hey honey, what are things that people like me who sew do that people who don’t sew don’t understand?” This was asked when I came home from a bike ride and found her sewing in her underwear. And that’s not the first time this has happened. Though I am not complaining.
1. Sewing in their underwear
Again, I am not complaining about this. But I also don’t understand it.
2. Petting fabric
My wife will secretly touch fabrics on people’s clothing if she wants to see what they’re made of. Don’t get me started on touching everything in the fabric store.
3. The word “Sewist”
Apparently she has the power to makeup words. I can’t find this word in the dictionary. My wife tried to explain it to me once, something about sewer looking just like the word for the pipes that carry the wastewater…and something about Shakespeare, then she started sounding like the teacher from Charlie Brown and I stopped listening. But that’s OK, because she has someone else to talk to, namely…
4. Talking to their sewing machines
It’s an inanimate object. It’s not going to hear her asking it to just please finish this one seam before running out of bobbin thread.
5. Going into the fabric store for “ten minutes” or “just one thing” and emerging 2 hours later with a cart load of fabric stuff
6. Pins everywhere
She has several perfectly good magnetic things and pin boxes but for some reason the pins don’t get put in them. Instead they go in the chair arms, where of course I’m going to put my arm and guess what just poked me….again. I don’t get it.
7. Buying fabric when she already has a ton
There’s probably some explanation about why she can’t just use what she has but if I have to hear one more time about how silk and taffeta are in fact different from one another….
8. Going ballistic about fabric scissors.
She hasn’t locked them up yet, but I have been yelled at. It’s just easier for me to go borrow the kids’ safety scissors. They know sharing, is caring.
9. Having more than one sewing machine
She has 5 (I’m looking at TWO of them right now). And that’s LESS than what she’s had before. I don’t get why one isn’t enough. Something about embroidery, serger, regular machine, backup machine, backup for the backup…And I know she goes and hangs out at Baby Lock (because she leaves me with the kids), so can’t they just make one machine that does all those things?
credits to: mellysews.com